HJM’S DIARY

When youth sports does its job so well, your athlete can walk away from it…

Posted by on 5:09 pm in America's Favorite Hockey Mom, Hockey Mom | 0 comments

When youth sports does its job so well, your athlete can walk away from it…

Now that AAA tryouts in AZ are done and everyone is fairly settled in, I’ve been receiving a lot of sweet messages asking where Dylan ended up. After being a freshman and only playing D3 high school last season, he went into AAA tryouts planning on just getting one good skate in with his buddies knowing a lot of them would be drafted away in the next few years. He saw it as his last travel try out. Just a few fun quality skates with friends with little, if any, possibility of being chosen. But when the call came that none of us expected… He made it… We were suddenly forced to revaluate everything. In shock, we sat down as a family and now carefully had to discuss an option we never even entertained once, because if we have learned one thing during our time in hockey, it’s that you don’t count your chickens before they hatch. There are no sure things. But that things always work out the way they are supposed to. After a few hours of taking it all in, and weighing all options, the time came for Dylan to do what some may see as the “unthinkable”. I listened as my “kid” called that coach, thanking him graciously for his time, consideration, and opportunity. He was not mumbling like he does always when speaking with me. He was speaking like a man. He was earnest and full of intention as he explained that for a long time all he wanted was to wear that uniform, but as shocking as it sounded even to him… He had finally learned to really like school this past year…not just the social aspect, working his part time job, and his fun high school hockey team… But actual school. And while he understands why the U16 AAA team needs to travel as much and as far as they do for exposure… He learned that when he missed a few days of school due to illness, his grades dropped even though he made up the work, and with honors classes,college dual enrollment business classes and Mandarin Chinese, he needs to be there. I sat quietly both proud and a little sad as I heard the words, “I’m not going to the NHL. It’s not even my goal. Going off to jrs isn’t even my goal. My goal is to go to college…to play hockey because it’s fun. And the kid who lives, eats, breathes hockey… The kid who wants jrs, NHL and has that dream… That’s the kid who should get my spot. Not me”… He thanked the coach again and hung up. A fork in the road moment beyond measure. And as the parent of an elite youth athlete, I couldn’t be more proud. It’s not about being the best or being on the best team… It’s about what’s best overall to develop not just the athlete, but more importantly, the person. And in the end, youth sports are about helping our children learn the skills to be the best overall person they can be. I owe youth sports, all of them and all of the people who have been a part of the journey, a huge thank you for shaping my kiddo enough to know himself and his priorities...

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Ladies, How to Get What You Want From Your Man…Men, How to Give It to Them

Posted by on 10:06 pm in America's Favorite Hockey Mom, Health & Beauty, Hockey Mom | 0 comments

Ladies, How to Get What You Want From Your Man…Men, How to Give It to Them

 With slightly less than a week left until Mother’s Day, I’m counting down to one of my most unfavorite times in the salon… The annual “Post Mother’s Day disappointment venting.” Not by my clients… I have already told them the secret to happiness for all. But as I walk through the salon, the pervasive disappointment is undeniable as women unleash their frustration onto their stylists.  And who is 99% to blame for this… Women! (And maybe fairytales a little bit) We choose to be in relationships with men (who I think will even agree with me) are generally clueless to the minutia of our innuendos and expectations that so often lead them to failure in making proper gift choices. (Now I know some folks are the exception… If you have one of those rare unicorn men, congrats! And enjoy!… I also realize this is the point where folks sensitive about the growth of materialism will balk at this whole theory. If you’re one of those, stop reading because I am talking to the most of us who do enjoy receiving a nice gift on special occasions when possible and are not ashamed of it!)  That all being said, as women we need to understand the mind of the person we are hoping will, ironically, read ours. PS… That doesn’t happen. Men are men. Not mind readers. What makes women think that when we have to remind men of things that are in their best interest…like where they left their wallet or keys when they came home… That they will suddenly read our minds, remember some special moment from a family vacation 15 years prior, and then get our kids to participate in this grandiose plan??? It’s just unrealistic, unfair and lose/lose! That is how you end up with a toaster! (Which ps, in a man’s mind is a lovely gift that makes delightful things to help in the mothering and the nurturing of their loved ones. Ya see what we’re dealing with here?!)  So here’s what I propose to help the men in our life (and ourselves) to get through these gift giving occasions with flying colors!  TELL THEM WHAT YOU WANT  That’s the simple version. Here’s some helpful hints:  1. Create a list. A list that has all your likes, sizes, and favorite things from small (favorite candy) to complete wish list items. (Feel free to include web links and pictures) BE SPECIFIC! Make sure you include where they can get said items. Even if it seems obvious.  2. Update this list regularly and make sure it is specific!!! (Did I mention specific?!) If you don’t care about the color or style, be sure to say that but also what you would NOT like. (Otherwise, Murphy’s Gift Law with Men may kick in and you’ll get exactly the thing you wanted in the exactly wrong style.) 3. Enlist the help of family and trusted friends. Share this list just in case your man gets the idea he wants to surprise you but lost his list. Children can be very helpful with this as well. And no need to be ashamed… It teaches them good communication and how to overcome one of the ongoing life battles of communication between genders.  4. Lastly… Remind them of important dates. Sure, Christmas...

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Part 1 of HJM Plastic Surgery Reveal: No photoshop/untouched photos 

Posted by on 9:26 pm in Health & Beauty, Hockey Mom, Modeling | 0 comments

Part 1 of HJM Plastic Surgery Reveal: No photoshop/untouched photos 

               Earlier in the year with all of our self improvement regimens going on, I promised a full disclosure about all the things I do and have done to look the way I do. While I haven’t had any plastic surgery done to my face exactly (I did break my nose kick boxing at 14 and it was “fixed” yet I have always had a bit of bump and a deviated septum. I never went to have it fixed again because noses are a tricky thing and if I don’t really hate it and I can breathe well enough, I haven’t felt the need to take the time and energy to fix that). What I have done to my face is the use of Botox and Juvederm. (I have also had permanent tattoo eye liner but I will cover that when I blog abt my make up tricks and eye lashes!)  I’m approaching my 43rd birthday and I have been doing Botox since I was about 32. One of the funniest things I hear from people about my Botox usage is they always say, “Oh, you don’t need that! But that’s like telling somebody who has really white teeth, “Oh, you don’t need to brush your teeth! They’re so white.” I try to explain to people the reason they think I don’t need it is exactly because I have it! So to help demonstrate that, I really let my Botox and Juvederm wear off so that I could create some before and after photos that would show exactly why I do need that!  One of the other concerns I hear about people who are afraid to try injectables is that they don’t want to look super fake, ridiculous or emotionless. I have affectionately dubbed that “Scottsdale face”. We know we have all seen the women running around with giant duck lips and eyebrows raised so far they look scared. Using injectables, however, does not do that. OVER USING them does! While I’m a big fan of injectables, I do caution that it is imperative to find the right person to do them! And that does not necessarily mean a “doctor” or plastic surgeon. If they specialize in breast augmentation, body sculpting etc… That does not mean they have the expertise and talent to shape faces with fillers and Botox. It is a very delicate science that requires an experienced hand. That is why my go to gal is Lisa Williams from www.ultrasmoothskin.com.  I have entrusted my face to Lisa for abt 10 years and have never been disappointed. While her credentials, including Black Diamond certification (a must for anyone you consider) speak for themselves, I feel like the greatest testimony is how she has kept my face looking the same over the years. My lips have not grown, I do not look scared all the time, and people have no doubts as to what emotions I’m feeling! In fact, I just let her look at my face and decide what needs to be done. Recently, she noticed my lips were starting to lack a little fullness because of the aging process. So she decided to add back that fullness with some Juvederm. Again, only what little fullness that was disappearing. I was not born with Angelina Jolie...

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What I have In Common with Taylor Swift: “Weighing” In on Thigh Gap

Posted by on 10:20 pm in America's Favorite Hockey Mom, Bikini Hockey League, Health & Beauty, Hockey Mom, Members Only, Modeling | 0 comments

What I have In Common with Taylor Swift: “Weighing” In on Thigh Gap

                I’ve been wanting to address this topic for a while but wanted to choose my words carefully. Well, after last night’s Grammies… I’m over it. #rantahead Stop reading now if you’re a sensitive Sally. For those of you who missed it, last night at the Grammy’s, Taylor Swift’s beautiful, gorgeous, custom made Versace dress floated sideways revealing that she may indeed have “thigh gap”. First of all, kudos Taylor for wearing the proper under garment for such a high slit dress! Secondly, the controversy begins as Amy Schumer posted abt “Taylor” and her thigh gap and people began freaking that she’s body shaming… I don’t even know where to begin this blog without cursing.  I will start with Amy. She’s a comedian. She’s brash and off color. She still hasn’t been as offensive to Taylor as Kanye! So who cares!!! People aren’t even sure if she’s body shaming her. One of my biggest pet peeves in life is how sensitive society has become about almost everything. Let’s all lighten up a little bit… No thigh gap pun intended!  Secondly, and this is what’s been resting on the tip of my tongue for a long time, thigh gap is not necessarily a weight thing!!! And it’s not even particularly attractive or unattractive. It just is! Yes, Taylor is 5′ 10″ 119 lbs but in contrast, I am 5′ 4″, 121 lbs. I wear a variety of sizes depending on the maker, usually a 2 but some things in my closet are a size 6 or “large”. My bottom half is not “skinny” (although let’s be clear… I’m not complaining! I am not ashamed to say I like my body… Which is really the point of it all) I do not know Taylor’s thigh or hip measurement but my thighs are 21″ and my hip is 37″. And I have thigh gap. (And I also don’t have scurvy) From the front I don’t even look curvy because I have small hips. The majority of the 37″ come from how far my butt sticks out behind me. I have had to twist and contort my body over the years to create more of waist in photo shoots. Point is… I’m curvy yet I have thigh gap. In fact,Im often resting my hand there. (Stay calm, pervs and see the pics!) It’s not a thin thing. It’s not a wide hips thing. And for girls starving themselves trying to achieve it… It’s like wanting shorter fingers.  Some of the sexiest icons of all time did not have thigh gap. In fact, in the 1940s Betty Grable’s legs, which still look gorgeous by today’s standards, were insured for one million dollars! (Which is equivalent to nearly $17 million today!) Thigh gap is not pretty or ugly. It just is. I personally believe mine is partly due to the curvature of my spine that always had me being retested in grade school during the scoliosis check! And honestly… It’s a pain when you drop things into your lap and they fall to the floor and break. Thigh gap is over rated. Taylor has it. I have it. Grable and Monroe did not. We are all beautiful in our own way. And comedians make jokes. End of...

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Part 2 of the Tikhonov Connection: “Did we just become best friends…Yup!” 

Posted by on 3:27 pm in America's Favorite Hockey Mom, Health & Beauty, Hockey Mom, Modeling | 0 comments

Part 2 of the Tikhonov Connection: “Did we just become best friends…Yup!” 

Little did I know, when I was just seconds from asking Viktor Tikhonov if he needed money for a snack and reprimand him for interrupting my ice time (I mistook him for Dylan vs realizing he was just one of the Yotes and practice was letting out!) … That besides being on the team, besides what a legendary family he comes from… That his sister, Tatjana “Tiki” Tikhonov was already one of my favorite peeps! (See my previous post, Part 1 to read that full silly, almost humiliating story!)  And from this springs my #wcw! When I became friends with Tiki on social media about a year or so ago, I was clueless to all the history surrounding her and her family. As I mentioned in my previous post, I never saw the movie Miracle and while I love hockey and being a part of the community, the only super-fandom I can claim is being my kiddos biggest fan. I never try to act like I know all sorts of things about hockey. I just love my kid, watching him play and hopping on the ice myself as much as possible. That being said, I was drawn to a fellow female hockey lover, who was active in coaching youth hockey, loves her dog, and has impeccable fashion sense. Sure, I saw some reference to “skating with the Coyotes” but I never thought to ask questions about that. I simply enjoyed all the wonderful aspects that I had in common with my friend. It wasn’t until ironically, that her brother was traded to the Coyotes and people began mixing him and my kiddo up (even stopping Dylan for autographs lol) that I learned about the complete amazing story of the Tikhonov family.  Learning this history with different eyes than most, without having seen “Miracle”, was truly an honor. I feel privileged to hear the passion that Tiki has for not only her family’s hockey accomplishments, but how dedicated she is in keeping her grandfather’s and father’s memories and lessons alive. Yet despite all her passion, Tiki is truly humble. While I was easily able to get how much her family means to her out of her, in order to get to the bottom of all their many contributions to the hockey world, I had to research it on my own. In addition to being a part of an amazing hockey family, Tiki is just a straight up wonderful, down to earth woman with a beautiful heart who is so relatable and inspiring! What follows is just a peek into someone I’m proud to know. Thank you, Tiki for answering all my silly (and not so silly) questions!  HJM: First let’s start with, currently, what teams are you coaching?  Tiki: Right now I’m coaching the San Jose Jr.Sharks 19uAA girls, but Ive mostly coached Bantam-midget boys. In my camp I have days for younger and elite players. For private lessons I coach from 5u-70+ I started my Tikhonov Training Camp in my father’s honor and when my grandfather passed I held a camp in his. The camp is a way for their legacy to live on and not be forgotten. The logo for the camp is an actual silhouette of my father so its very dear to my heart. HJM: What...

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Dylan, the Tikhonov Connection, and How It Became My Women Crush Wednesday(#wcw) ?! Part 1

Posted by on 12:26 am in America's Favorite Hockey Mom, Hockey Mom, Members Only | 0 comments

Dylan, the Tikhonov Connection, and How It Became My Women Crush Wednesday(#wcw) ?! Part 1

  Most people who know me, realize that uncanny shenanigans, that I couldn’t even make up if I tried, tend to follow me wherever I go. This story is no exception of my Lucille Ball type coincidences.  Recently, I started receiving messages from fans asking if Dylan was now playing on the AZ Coyotes… ( ARIZONA Coyotes???) He just turned 15 but considering he was 14 at the time, I thought these fans must have meant the Jr Coyotes. But when I clarified, nope, they meant the real Coyotes. I was puzzled and thought it was odd but honestly kinda forgot.  Shortly after, around Christmas, I was at a public skate session that was happening at the same time as the Yotes practice on another rink. However, their locker room faces the rink where public occurs so it’s very normal to see them when the times coincide. It was festive, with the lights down, Christmas lights up, lotsa kiddos… And I look up to see a few of the Yotes standing, watching, and amongst them, I see my kid. (For those of you who don’t know, Dylan, albeit barely 15, is pushing 6′ 2″ and 180 lbs) I see him standing there in a T Shirt, classic hat on backwards, long hair pushed behind his ears. As I skated by, I wondered why he was pestering the Coyotes, and I had left him home so how did he even get to the rink, and the only reason he ever tries to get my attention is for money for food. Annoyed with him, I quicken my lap through children and Frosty the Snowman on skates, to get back around to him and see what he wants. I’m already in my “annoyed mom” mode and as I’m just abt 15 feet away and ready to throw my arms up in frustration that he’s interrupting my skate… I realize that it’s not my kid at all! I quick cross over and skate away! Although I was surprised by the “Coyote Dylan Imposter” and meant to look into it… With all I had on my plate, I forgot! Lol.  Later that day, I was on Insta and I saw my friend Tatjana had posted something. We became social media friends a year or so ago because we both like hockey, but I also love her posts abt her dog, fashion, and girly things… In addition to a concentration in youth hockey. But when I went to her page, who did I see?! THE DYLAN IMPOSTER!!! Again, for a split second it looked like Dylan in a Blackhawks uniform and then a Yotes. But when I read the post, Tatjana was talking abt how her brother was leaving the Blackhawks and playing for the Yotes! FINALLY!!! Mystery solved!!! Dylan is being confused with my friends brother, who I figured out was named Viktor. Laughing at this coincidence and it’s crazy timing, I message Tatjana abt it telling her to make sure she lets her brother know that if the Yotes are teasing him that he looks like a local 14 yr old (which is right up their alley) that she can show Viktor that the 14 yr old doesn’t look exactly like a 14 yr old. (Vik’s stats say he is 6’2″ 189lbs… Super close...

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In remembrance of Micah Lieb

Posted by on 9:55 pm in America's Favorite Hockey Mom | 0 comments

In remembrance of Micah Lieb

  When those of us in the hockey community hear the name Micah Lieb… Usually one of two emotions follow: gratitude; if he’s in your net, or dread; if he happens to be in the other team’s net. And while he is notorious for “Stopping pucks and … Stopping pucks”, there is so much more to this talented and diverse young man. Micah was an incredibly intelligent and intellectually curious student, his love of music and ability to sing probably rivaled his ability on the ice, and a beloved son, brother, family member, and friend does no justice to the impact he had on all of us. All of these amazing qualities made him easy to love and that is why his last act of bringing together a close knit but diverse community, to say goodbye was one of his most impressive. A swarm of hockey jerseys of competing organizations and fierce rivals, standing side by side feeling the pain of their lost comrade. That day, there wasn’t any single individual team. It was simply one large family comforting each other and celebrating the accomplishments of Micah Lieb. Despite all the wonderful, amazing and incredible ways he impacted us, sometimes the brightest stars have trouble seeing their own light amongst the darkness. This struggle led Micah Lieb to take his own life. We share this not only in remembrance of his almost 16 years with us, but also in hope. Hope that while we can not being our friend back, that we can save another. Hope that if one person hearing the story of this amazing soul and how much we will always love him, may take pause should they be contemplating ending their own life. Just make one call. Just one call because you are loved. You are important. And you are needed. Let someone hold up that mirror to show you how beautifully you actually shine.  National Suicide Prevention Hotline  1 800 273 TALK (8255)...

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Dishing On My Love Life and How It Helps Me Stay Fit! (Part 1 of #NYNY)

Posted by on 10:08 pm in America's Favorite Hockey Mom, Bikini Hockey League, Health & Beauty, Hockey Mom, Members Only, Modeling | 0 comments

Dishing On My Love Life and How It Helps Me Stay Fit! (Part 1 of #NYNY)

I’m not one to speak publicly abt my love life… But inspired by the E! Channels “A New Year, A New You” project, I’m sharing like never before! And since my fitness routine is inextricably tied to the greatest loves in my life… It’s as good as time as any to fess up! Firstly, I’m honored to receive fitness, beauty and lifestyle questions (which often the answers are a collection of ideas learned from all the wonderful women … And men!…in my life! I cannot take sole credit!) So for my first New Year New You (#nyny) post, I’m going to answer the fitness question since so many of us are on our diets, sticking to resolutions and trying to get rid of the damage we did over the holidays.  The simple answer to physical fitness is love. It’s just really that simple.  Love what you do and you will be consistent. For me, I skate, walk George (a one and half year old boxer) and do ballet and gymnastics in living room when no ones home and my favorite song comes on! #truestory #lilembarrassingfact The cheerleader in me will never die!  Love yourself for every little step you take in your journey of fitness! Whether it’s a literal step, jog, jump, squat, or twirl around the living room, and celebrate every little small victory! I sometimes add it to my “to-do” list after the fact with a heart next to it just so I feel accomplished!  Love who you do it with! I started skating with my kiddo, but now have an entire group of kiddos and families that I see at public skate. I love walking George and seeing our neighbors and his dog friends. And even if group activities are hard to organize, you can join Fitbit challenges! You’ll be amazed how addicting and fun they are! People can even cheer your progress!    Love what you wear while you do it! I’m sorry, but shallow or not, the gear is often fun! And the fashionista in me will always be alive! I’m not ashamed to say that sometimes putting on the new Victoria’s Secret Pink leggings gets me moving! Or wearing work out clothes as regular casual wear gets me to be more active when those living room twirling opportunities present themselves.  Above all else, choose love, and you won’t go wrong! You can only win! … Oh yeah…as for my romantic love life… We’ll save that story for another day...

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Happy New Year 2016! 

Posted by on 10:39 pm in America's Favorite Hockey Mom, Bikini Hockey League, Health & Beauty, Hockey Mom, Members Only, Modeling | 0 comments

Happy New Year 2016! 

Just want to take a quick second to wish you all the most amazing year to come filled with love, laughter, joy, adventure, and magic! Here’s to making all your dreams come true this year! All my love, HJM! XO!    

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#WCW Olivia and Siri Inspire 

Posted by on 11:13 pm in America's Favorite Hockey Mom, Bikini Hockey League, Health & Beauty, Hockey Mom, Members Only, Modeling | 0 comments

#WCW Olivia and Siri Inspire 

One of the best parts of working in the salon and making people more beautiful is all the great bonding with my clients who really become more like an extended family! My youngest client is 3 and my oldest is 85. I am grateful for all the joy and fun and inspiration they bring to me daily! But today I had the joy of beautifying the Swinford sisters (minus lovely Nicole who is studying abroad! We miss you!) Today, on top of our normal scintillating conversations that run the gambit from gossip, to life experiences, to intellectual topics that have us all googling for answers… Olivia gave me the most fun and fabulous tip! … On an iPhone, there is an option to label your alarms. And while in that editing option, you can place an inspiring message to start your day! I’ve just created a few to start my day tomorrow! Can’t wait to wake up to my own happy greeting! … Ok… Maybe that’s a bit extreme so for everyone who knows me and knows I’m not a morning person 😝… I’m hoping my happy greeting at least gets me moving towards my coffee faster!  XO! ...

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